Every parent wants his or her child to have a good start in life and get as much as possible, whether it be for play or for parental attention. But can it be taken to the fire?Let's be disappointed, let's make a mistake! - Don't be a helicopter!What can happen if the parent's attention is stressed at one point and the opposite effect is what we want it to be, and later the child's point is due to this over-attention in different life situations?
Helicopter, bulldozer, and bulletproof?The name "helicopter" Dr. Haim Ginott it was first used in a 1969 book for teenage children and their parents.
Ginott calls it a helicopter whohe is constantly around the child and does not allow him space. Even the term "lame parent" or "bulldozer" is also present. Although analyzing middle-school or college-student child-parent relationships, it is often overwhelming, but helicopter can appear at any age. It can't be that, because a baby-to-be-born high-schooler child relationship is definitely not a foregone experience. it will be the parents who drop off in high school - or at least try to drop off the kid's friends, see their tickets and organize the little ones, all games are controlled and controlled, never leave them alone. The helicopter all in one take too much responsibility for child impact. Almost completely overlaps with this "lame parent" who "removes" all obstacles in front of the child and puts down all problems. For a parent of this type, it is important to make sure that your child always looks perfect - clean clothes, neat hair, and companions - and if my lord does not, then you will immediately correct the problem.
Natural Dependency - Optimal Shifting
Why would someone buy a helicopter?
Why not: We try to live up to the expectations of others, instead of following our own values and rules.
9 signs that you belong to the helicopter
1. Let them talk about your ideas, and even explicitly encourage them to suggest - for example. which way to go to grandma with whom you would like to meet. This is helped by open-ended inquiries that not only can or cannot be answered. And maybe don't give "better" ideas right away.
2. Ensure Choice - Depending on your age, only two will be chosen first, but let's talk about decision situations later and look for more solutions.
3. If you have a hard time letting go, step by step, you only need one half a day of your life first and do not divide every minute. Boredom has sparked creativity, one that is devoted every minute to someone else missing out on this very useful mindset. But who knows what children can do if we let them unfold and follow and support their development rather than controlling and controlling every minute.
- dr. Skita Erika Communication Hipster, Emotional Intelligence Trainer - This article appeared in Maternity Magazine, which you can subscribe to online. Look for the latest issue from the New Yorkers!Related articles in helicopter train:
- Leave it alone!
- Old style: Which character?
- Is the helicopter parent having anxiety?