Useful information

Let us be saved by the devastated Firstborn!


A little brother is born ... What does he think of him, who has been the only one so far and who has suddenly become "bigger"? Never again is this "small". What can you feel?

Let us be saved by the devastated Firstborn!In order to understand what can be played in it, we need to go back to the time when everything was born, first born. Not only the movements of his parents' children, but his whole family, his relatives were just concerned with him: he was given a gift, they told him, everyone listened to it. Let's just think: everything that was only uvvé so far. He's right to fight over these! We as adults know, or even say that the little brother is not a stranger, he will not feel that way, especially if he is still too prepared for a great deal of worthwhile work. let's write it down. So you will be less disturbed by this conflict. What's more, it's important and inevitable, because in the long run, this will be the basis for "other" acceptance.

How do we tell him?

Just as parents are tuned in for the next day to give birth to their children, so be sure to give them time to prepare. Let's talk about becoming more and more, let's share the excitement of getting ready, waiting for you. If you are dealing with a family with multiple children (in parenting or play), let us know how good you are, but at least "interesting", "other", when they will be born to their brother. The moments gained during pregnancy can be crucial: the immediate experience of a mom's raised tummy, and later of a baby's movement, gives a sense of intimacy. You'll be sure of your questions (how did the little one get, how to get air, what to eat?) That we can answer by putting him in the center, as he did the same thing. Of course, we wouldn't talk about where he was, where he came from, unless we were really interested. Include it in your daily routine, make it a part of the event! You can decide to buy a baby doll for your family, help you arrange your little clothes, and ask them what their name is.

Let's get ready for what's next.

The birth of a little brother is inevitably changing. He also has to adapt. It would be nice if you did not survive this, but a natural process. An important aspect of cohabitation learning is that the family and the little one need to work it out. It's a good idea, for example, to discuss what your life is going to change, as this is a very good "problem-solving" pattern for you. If you have questions about her, give her the decision status: for example, if you need to share your room with the little one, ask her where you want to make her new, own nook and respect.

Make it big when you get home a little!

If your little brother is born in a townhouse, mention in time that Mom won't be home for a few days. Let's try to make it clear to ourselves (too!) That childbirth is not a disease and should not be afraid. Think about how exciting days you can spend with the priest: they can make some surprises together, and have a good time with your mom. In this case, Dad can tell you what the first few weeks will be like: where will your mother breastfeed, where she will rest, and you can involve her in the preparations.

It is important that you do not feel left out

Now that "bigger" kid can keep his or her own world private, we can strengthen it by paying attention to his or her own bunny, toy, "secret" object. It is important that parents have time and patience. Let's make sure there is a time every day, even if we're short when we're just dealing with the big one. And here it is not the duration of the cohesiveness, but the "depth" that counts. We do not have to find anything special, but rather get familiar with well-known stories, songs, games. If possible, keep it regular, have a rhythm, rhetoric for these people, as this will increase your security. There are many opportunities to be centered and comfortable on weekdays as well. You can ask her what to have for dinner, make her favorite food, sometimes decide what her mom (like the little ones) should sing, and so on.

Temporary setbacks occur

It is only natural that the behavior of a small brother is influenced by his behavior and development. Unfortunately, there is often an unfavorable turn: whoever was clean, peeing again, whiter, more hysterical, in the worse case, becomes aggressive and sick. "Message" is generally clear: it requires attention and attention in one way or another. If we understand this, we also know that it is only a matter of transition, it will be easier for all of us. It doesn't matter to us whether it is time spent with it telling stories, playing games or looking for pelus, changing clothes ...

Ensure that the tension is released!

Fierce games like rude toys and fairy tales can do a good job, but experience has shown that offering a baby - a little more lifelike - that she can "take care of" while her mom deals with the little brother. It's good for boys too! Anyway, a lot of baby dolls are needed, after he often runs down his senses on the baby… The baby will fulfill his hopes anyway. Therefore, we should not be frightened of the horrorous scenes, nor would we be deterred from filling his vengeance on this occasion because of his "feelings". Slowly, a new order of life is emerging. Everyone finds his place, and he finds that he also gets love and attention. Let her know how fast your sister is developing that she will soon need so much time and care from her mom. Tell her that if she gets bigger, what kind of stuff she'll be able to play with, talk to, talk about, hang out with. And we have to keep somewhere, how good you were when the kids were young.

No, no, no !!!

  1. By no means do you expect the big one to love the little one, because feelings are not created by command.
    2. Do not force you to express your love by kissing and caressing.
    3. Do not be harshly scolded if you dare play to the small and accidentally hit the little one. Explain to him that such small things still have nothing to do with the games.
    4. Do not interrupt the game with the big without any changes if the little one is playing. It wouldn't be sporty if only the big one had to keep trying and adapting.
    5. Don't talk to the big ear about how much the little brother's birth will or will not bear. Instead, tell your relatives proudly, so that they can hear how gorgeous and uncluttered they are, or how great they can choose which outfit to wear that day.
    6. Do not send "grandmother" to your grandmother, be at home when you bring your baby home.
    7. Relatives and visitors should not just be around the little one. Admire the big one too, bring her little surprises.

Don't think the big numbers are all public.

Matyi was two and a half years old when the newborn little brother moved home from the court. The family slept together on a huge double bed when the little brother woke up the first night. He was just getting up, so he had to be cleansed. Alarmed, Matyi only saw that in the light of the little lamp, the mother was leaning on the sore throat. He was terribly asked by his father: Why is the mother poor Christopher? We were very surprised, since child-rearing had no tradition in the family.

We were surprised that Matyi didn't always understand what was going on around him, even if it seemed so public in the eyes of adults. We explained to her that little babies sometimes take a very bad name when they are undressed, especially if they are still hungry.

The games make it possible to formulate and deduce aggressive feelings in Bence's world as a gentle, quiet child. He had never done anything wrong with his little brother, he didn't wear pepper under his parents' nose, and wore it gently if he wasn't in the center. However, in her role, there were elements that appeared to show that there were severe thunderstorms somewhere: her hair was good friends, they went out to play together.

Then there were more and more accidents with the brown bear. The others struck the chute, walked over to the small car, and sipped sand into their food. And then I was thrown into the chasm, where he died. Bence's mom was raped. He didn't scold the boy for blaming him and cure that poor bear, but instead picked up the card and said, "I see others don't like teddy bears." They don't want to play with it. They don't want to give her a play ball. And Bence was buzzing.
Dr. Katalin Varga psychologist

Related articles in this topic:

  • Brethren: Bring the Greatest!
  • The first one
  • Come on, what do I have to say to the big one?