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You don't apologize? Tips instead of forcing


It's good to be able to apologize to your child, but it's worth using other methods instead of forcing them. Here are some tips.

Laura Markham According to a child psychologist, excusing a small child to make an apology is a bad one. "When you ask a child to apologize before they are ready, does it not improve the relationship at all?" - read on Smartparenting.com. But what do we do when we find ourselves in a situation where should your child ask for leniency? Dr. Sanya Pelini educational research and experts advise.Let the emotions settle down

1. First, let the senses settle

If you begin to explain to your child what you have to say and why you should apologize, you will probably find it difficult to understand because you are always upset or nervous. Let it calm downto have time to think about what you did. Let's stick to it, but let's not leave it that far.

2. Stay calm

"Remember that one children usually still feel that they are the blasphemous one, if they have actually blamed others? - says Pelino. If we get mad in this state, it will only make you feel sorry for yourself. Let's stay determined but calm.

3. Focus on the situation

Instead of just asking the little one to apologize, explain to him what happenedand now what the other kid is up to. Let's use expressions that he has written. For example, if you took a game from someone, you should tell them not to just take it away. Explain to her that she should be asked, "Can I buy a little ??

4. Make sure you do what you did

When we see that our child has truly forgiven what he has done, let him apologize on his own: this can be a word of apology, but also a greeting, or giving the game a draw, drawing something to the others, and so on. We can give him tips, too, but the point is to be able to identify with the choice. Feel that we too agree with your apology.

5. Show an example

If our child resists all of this, let's return the game to the one who took it and ask for our forgiveness, and then add that we don't know what he did and that we will talk about it with our child. The goal is for the little ones to play together again in the future, and to remain a thorn in the head. "Do kids have a clear idea of ​​how to solve a situation like this," says Markham. instead of you - which a two-man is almost certainly not worth - try to lead him in another proactive way to do good. For example, we might ask "what do you think we can do to prevent XY from singing" or "what to do to make XY calm?" This will bring the problem closer to you and give you a better idea of ​​where you are. This is the first step (stopping empathy) in the direction of a child being able to apologize later.Related materials: